Why I Believe in God

God spoke to me during my senior year of high school, and I would never be confident in my own logic and reasoning again. In college, he met with me in a much more dynamic way. From that day on, I would never again doubt His existence, character, or power. It changed me. I was more secure. More free. More giving. More confident. It was not the faith of my parents that convinced me of God's existence, or the testimony of scripture, or the evidence of creation, or the complexities of science. It was the undeniable contact with my creator. It is hard to prove that any of my experiences were genuine. They were, but how could I convince a skeptic? As a child, I remember being stirred in my spirit, like an astronaut staring at something beautiful and overwhelming in space. The feeling would happen at random moments and would draw me into simple worship, even when I was just riding in a car or lying in bed. From the moment of my conversion (age six) I was a fanatic. I read my Bible every night. I made my own tracts and carried those and a box of Bibles through my neighborhood. By third grade, I had the read the Bible from cover to cover three times in three different translations. By the time I graduated high school, I had read it twelve times. But all of that reading, though beneficial for facts and stories, only led to arrogance. I used knowledge like a weapon. I complained. I boasted. I argued. It wasn't until the Holy Spirit actually spoke to me that I realized I was in a relationship with a being that wanted to interact. This is basically what he said to me: You will never be an effective Christian until you learn to love me. As I continued to grow, I struggled with many of the issues I listed on the previous Skeptic Blogs, but more than anything else, I struggled with the challenge that God gave me. How could I love what I could not see or understand? I prayed constantly about it. I refused to sing or talk about God's love until He proved himself. In February of 1995, he answered my prayers in a way that left me trembling and forever changed. Ask me about it sometime. I have had many stories since, many of which will creep into these blogs, but for now, this will have to do. However, I do have one logical argument, though I hate to use it. There are smart people on every side of every argument, making truth seem unreachable. Thank God for the Holy Spirit! But if you don't have much personal experience with God, I can offer you at least one logical assurance. The law of cause and effect demands that something must pre-exist everything in order for anything to exist. Simply stated: nothing comes from nothing. It doesn’t matter how far back you go in the chain of cause and effect, there must be an ultimate cause that has no beginning. We may not understand a creature like that, but we don’t need to understand it. We just need to accept the necessity of it. If logic demands that something eternal exists, whether it is a tiny germ floating on a space crystal, or a conscious alien being, scientists should be looking for that eternal “thing” that started it all. Thankfully, we don’t have to look far. A spirit that claims to match this exact description has been revealing itself to men and women for as long as history has been recorded. Isaiah, a Jewish prophet, claimed to speak for a being that is "the high and lofty one, inhabiting eternity.” When Moses asked for God’s name, he was told, “I am,” which seems to speak of a creature in an eternal present. Jesus said, “Before Abraham was, I am,” designating a contrast between a time-based creature and an eternal creature (was versus am). There is also quite a bit in scripture talking about how God’s power and character never change, another quality of someone living in an eternal present. God’s ability to speak of future events with exact times and places also suggests his ability to see the future as if it were just sitting there in front of him. God is known to challenge men with statements like, “Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth?” Decent question. My answer would be: “Uh . . . in Doc Brown’s time mach---” NOTE: This sentence would be cut short by a bolt of lightning. d In the historical record of God working with people (AKA the Bible), we see his creative power in the miraculous. There is a difference between being a manipulator of matter, and a creator of matter. Walking on water, calming storms, causing fish to obey, or healing a human body can all be replicated by any spiritual power. But to turn a boy’s lunch into a meal for 5,000 men requires creative power. To give life to a dead man requires creative power. These powers were on display in Jesus, who claimed to live as an expression of God. I am definitely intrigued by these arguments for the existence of God, but my personal experience with God is what puts everything to rest. Bottom line: I believe in him because I know him. Why do you believe?

The Power of Belief

We don't give Belief enough credit. There is nothing more potent in our lives, for good or for evil. Belief manipulates our emotions. It dictates our actions. It prompts our will. Children, spouses, friends, culture, politicians, the media, and all kinds of spiritual forces battle to influence our belief systems, but that is one thing that they can't take by force. It is yours to surrender. But what about God? Does he have the ability to manipulate belief? If so, when and why? Go to http://www.biblegateway.com/ and do a word search for Believe. If you read through the New Testament references, you'll find that Jesus teaches a lot about the consequences of believing and not believing. In John 6, when the people asked him, "What shall we do, that we may do the works of God?" Jesus told them, "This is the work of God, that you believe in the one he has sent." Jesus did miracles, spoke of things before they happened, and prayed aloud specifically so that people would believe his message. He complained about people that refused to believe despite the evidence. Why not just make them believe? Why not manipulate their hearts? Well, that has happened. Romans 9 gives a few examples. Apparently, at times, it is necessary for God to manipulate hearts to accomplish his work. It seems reasonable to think that God would prefer not to manipulate the free belief systems of man, just like a parent would prefer a child to obey and participate freely in a family. But sometimes, for whatever reason, a kid needs to be taken by the arm and forced. Apparently, God is the only being with the ability and authority to do that. Most Calvinists believe that every conversion is a result of soul manipulation. God calls, men must respond. Most Arminians believe that God calls, and they can decide whether or not to pick up the phone based on the evidence provided and whether or not they had enough sleep the night before. Maybe the truth is somewhere in the middle.

Skeptic Wrap-up

Have I mentioned how much I'm enjoying this? I hope that you continue to visit in the months to come as we move away from questions and start working toward answers. The plan is to have a weekly topic, set up a poll, and write three or four related posts. I will try to generate discussions that anyone with an interest in spiritual things can join. If you think I'm wandering off the path of orthodoxy, let me know. But be ready to back it up. And please, try to avoid Christianese.

The poll for this past week shows that there is approximately a 2-to-1 ratio of people that feel nervous or terrified in evangelism versus those who are okay or confident. Why do we feel so nervous? If I discovered a cure for cancer, would I feel nervous divulging that information? If I was single and getting engaged to a world-famous celebrity, would I feel nervous about advertising that union? We should feel eager and excited.

So why are we so nervous? Here are a few possibilities:

We believe the gospel, but we don't understand it well enough to share, afraid that a skeptic will ask a question that we can't answer.

We are muzzled by our own sinfulness, and do not feel qualified to share.

We don't want to impose our beliefs on others, recognizing that everyone has the freedom to live by their own convictions.

We hate the anxiety associated with those awkward conversations.

We are so saturated by Christian culture, we don't even talk to non-believers.

It is important to widen our view of Christianity so that we can approach issues from all different angles, seeing the concepts so clearly that our explanations are completely comprehensive. I feel that the gospel message has been packaged into a neat little formula that gives humanity a limited view of the larger picture, like trying to look at the Grand Canyon through binoculars.

I feel that, with such limited understanding, we settle into our God marriages in a way that is anything but world changing. We attend church every Sunday, pan for devotional nuggets every morning, pray when something bad happens, and maybe attend a mid-week Bible study. It seems like Christians tend to tread water until they die, waiting for the afterlife where things are really going to get interesting. If that's true, this whole Earth Experiment seems dumb. Why not just create humans in heaven and hell and forget all the drama in between?

In Hebrews 6:1, Paul encourages his people to leave the elementary teachings about Christ and press on toward maturity. I feel like the elementary principles are all we know. If we knew what maturity looked like, we might try harder to get there. I think most Christians walk around with an attitude that says, "We'll never really understand anything until we get to heaven, so we might as well just focus on sin management until then."

Not only is this unbiblical, it mocks Christ's sacrifice. What if I had a baby that never grew up? It just drank milk and cried all the time. Sometimes it would spit up, but that's okay. Daddy loves to clean it up, right? Abba? Abba? Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Spiritual maturity brings confidence, power, and wisdom. The desire for sin fades naturally, just like the appetite of a child changes over time. We get to know God in ways that are more familiar, but also more challenging. If you're tired of feeling spiritually weak and ignorant, it's time to move forward. It's time to start growing up.

Skeptic #4

Statement #4: To experience God's love and plan, we must individually believe and accept the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. There is no controversy in this statement, just a moment of truth. Will you decide, based on the urging of your mind and heart, to make this eternal commitment? Like Magnus VonHayden mentioned in one of his comments, this is a contract, like a marriage. For many, even those who are moved by their own sin and the offering of divine forgiveness, there are still a few questions to be answered before they pick up their soul pens. To stay with my skeptical stance, I am purposefully ignoring the work of the Holy Spirit in evangelism, though most of you would probably see this as ignoring the sugar in a batch of sugar cookies. What about the billions of people who never get the chance to hear the terms of the contract? I'm talking about children, the mentally ill, people in third world countries, and so on. Are they subject to the penalties of rejection? In other words, do they have to burn in hell for an eternity for their ignorance? What about all of the violence and injustice that God commanded Israel to do in the Old Testament? If I am to believe that God is loving and just, I must have a resolution to these concerns. Christian history is filled with stories of arrogant men fighting over doctrine and leadership resulting in cheating, stealing, lying, abuse, and murder on a massive scale. If the gospel does not have the power to change its people for the better, why should I sign up? There are many more reasons. If you want them, just go to exchristian (dot) net and spend some time getting into the heads of some former church goers. The testimonies may frustrate you or make you angry, you also might get a little depressed, but I hope, at the same time, it challenges you. What can you say to defend the questions of skeptics? Is your faith strong enough to stand on its own two feet, or do you prop it up against the company of like-minded individuals? I'll save my personal feelings for the final post of this week, but for now, I would be interested in hearing yours.

Skeptic #3

Statement #3: Jesus Christ is God’s solution for sin, making it possible for believers to connect with God and experience his love and plan for their life.

Imagine yourself as a movie-goer, stepping out of The DaVinci Code, wondering whether your should stop by Starbucks, grab some Macho Nachos, or believe that Jesus had consensual relations with Mary Magdalene. As you exit the theater, a college guys with sunglasses on his head asks if he can have a moment of your time. At first you think he's looking to sell you his self-made demo CD or handing out discounts for Fuddruckers, but instead he wants to talk to you about Jesus.

He asks you about the movie, nods at your answers, then starts to pry into your belief system. Soon he's targeting your conscience, trying to get you to see what a terrible person you are. The moment you admit to some weakness, a solution is posed: the death and resurrection of Jesus. He might open a Bible and read something like: "the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." He might call you a lost sheep. He might tell you that you need to be washed in the blood of Jesus. He might ask if you want to ask Jesus into your heart as your personal Lord and Savior.

For Christians, these phrases seem harmless and helpful, but for an outsider, they must sound like cultish nonsense. Washed with blood?

The death and resurrection of Jesus is arguably the most important event in human history, but to a skeptic, there are some serious problems with it. I'll mention a few:

If I truly love someone that has hurt me, and they come to me with an apology, I don't demand a blood sacrifice to restore that relationship. Why does God, who should be more loving and reasonable that his creation, require a human sacrifice to forgive sin? Besides, Jesus was forgiving sin before He died.

Thanks for the invitation to join God's family, but if God is in the habit of killing his own children, I would prefer to opt out of the adoption process.

Why should we believe the record of the New Testament when there are so many gospels and letters left out of the canon? Besides, after such a long and questionable history, and so much translating and retranslating, can we even trust the Bible?

If Jesus and God are the same person, then the Biblical account of his death and resurrection is insane. God was so angry at man’s sin, that he became a man himself, killed himself, then brought himself back to life. He felt much better after that and forgave everyone who believed. Was Jesus praying to himself in the garden, asking himself to let himself off the hook? While dying on the cross, did he ask himself why he had forsaken himself? Did he commit his own spirit into his own hands? It defies logic.

Would you have a reasonable answer to these questions?

Skeptic #2

Statement #2: You are a sinner, separated from the loving plan of God. My skeptical self would have less trouble with this statement, at least at first. Most of us would admit that we aren't perfect. Who is? Christians would say that Jesus and Adam were perfect, but does that mean they were really good at Calculus? Did they ever trip or jam a finger? Did they ever get sick? Did they poop? If so, did it smell like garlic mashed potatoes? In evangelism, when we talk about "perfect," we're talking about going through life without a single bad thought or selfish act. But what if we don't act on those natural impulses? Are we still sinners? What if we act on them, but our actions harm no one? It's easy to tell a convicted criminal that they are a sinner, but what about a moral person with an honest and caring heart? There are many of these people working in world, saving lives, helping people, and many of them are not Christians. What makes the Christians any more pure than the well-meaning non-Christians? My skeptical self would respond to my Evangelical self by saying, "I'm just as much of a sinner as you. Why do I need your salvation?" In other words, if salvation is innefective in a tangible, practical sense, why should I believe in the rest of your gospel message, including the parts about heaven and hell? The Reformed tradition emphasizes the Total Depravity of man as the first pedal of their TULIP (their five-point summary of the Christian faith). This depravity is sort of like a virus, a curse, that humans contract from Adam. If you could see it, it would probably look like the black tar that turned Eddie Brock into Venom, but on your soul. Jesus takes the tar out when you're saved, but the stain remains, which basically means you'll act the same, but he won't hold it against you. I plan to blog on sin and depravity at another time, but for now, I just want to stir the pot. Remember, I do believe in the Christian faith, but faith is not blind. Let's not ignore these things and use "faith putty" to fill our gaps of logic. That dishonors God, and it makes Christians look foolish. I have another problem with telling people that they're sinners. If the skeptic is logical, he will realize that a faulty product is not to blame for it's own faultiness. If I buy a new car and the steering wheel comes off while I'm driving, I don't get angry at the steering column. If I survive the inevitable wreck, I'd go straight back to the manufacturer and demand a refund. I think you see where I'm going. If God is perfect and man was created perfect, how could the human race go wrong so quickly? I recognize that we have a free will, but why, in her freedom, would Eve choose the wrong thing before the tar-like depravity kicked in? Was she created with a propensity toward rebellion, or was she just naive? Why did Adam go along with it? The spiritual being that deceived her was another example of one of God's creatures gone wrong. We all know he wasn't naive. If God's creatures, left to their own devices, have a tendency to rebel against their Creator, it seems like there is something wrong in the programming. It would seem that sin was God's intention from the beginning. Besides, wouldn't God have foreseen all of these rebellions and done something about them? He wasn't even present at the Fall of Man. He knew it would happen. He knew they would sin. It almost seems as if the Fall was God's intention from the beginning. Thoughts?

Skeptic #1

I'm going to play a skeptic. Then I'm going to witness to myself and get defensive about it. I'll use the Four Spiritual Laws as a progression to confession, keeping my feet firmly planted on the Romans Road. STATEMENT #1: God loves you and has a plan for your life. Despite the nice sentiment, my skeptical self is bothered, not encouraged, by this statement. These are the kinds of questions that immediately come to mind: 1) If God is so loving, why is the world such a horrific mess? 2) If God is so loving, why would he kill his only son under any circumstances? 3) If God is so loving, why did my mother die of cancer and my uncle lose his arm in an accident? 4) If God has a plan for my life, why doesn't he share it with me? 5) Did God have a plan for my next door neighbor's life? He's a loser. He'll die a loser. 6) Why would God make a plan knowing that I would blow it anyway? 7) Why would God make a plan for my life if, in the grand scheme, it's all pointless anyway. 8) With so many people in the world, why would he even want to know me, much less care? Imagine an ant farm the size of the Grand Canyon. Now imagine God as a zealous ant farmer, naming every ant and paying attention to each and every one of them. He loves them enough to keep tabs on their journeys to and from the surface, making sure there are no leaves or sticks in their way as they carry lumps of mud and dead things to their queen. Sometimes he puts a rock in their path to see what they do with it, or even squashes a few, but it's all part of grand scheme that no ant could understand or imagine. Most Christians like to answers these kinds of questions with big words. We explain that God is omnipresent, which is how he can pay attention to each one of us. He is also omnipotent, which is how he can plan each life and imbue each person with the skills and talents to accomplish those plans. But why would he use all of his omnis on little old you? Are you that lovable? As for the human chaos, we may use a parable to explain: Think of each human life as a thread in a great tapestry which God is patiently weaving throughout history. All we see in this world are the tangled mess of threads in the back, but some day, in the next world, He’s going to turn the tapestry around and show us the beautiful and complicated finished product. It's a nice parable, but is it true? How would you defend these questions?